Hi guys,
Now that you have shared your writings with your classmates and teacher, it is time for you to post your final version of the paragraph. Then, make final comments on other clasmmate's paragraph and then write a reflexion on how you dealed with the parapgraph writing: the difficulties found, what you learned, what was easy, etc.
I hope to see how you have improved!!
Regards,
Teacher Nallely
Dying your hair is easier than you think. First, make sure your hair is clean; second prepare the color. Take a small plastic bowl and a wide coloring brush; next, pour the color and the hydrogen, and mix them thoroughly with the brush. Check if you have enough of it, and also that you get an homogenous mixture. Before you start coloring, brush you hair and, if it still tangled, brush it again or it will not color properly. Then put the protective gloves on and start coloring ½ inch on each side; once you end the left part, continue with the right side. When you have finished put all the hair inside a shower cap or plastic bag and wait for 45 minutes. The next step is to wash the excess color of your hair using a color protection shampoo and color protection conditioner. Finally dry your hair and enjoy the result.
ReplyDeleteI see you fixed the punctuation marks and some words, looks a lot better now! Good job! Now I think there's a comma that isn't necessary, but I don't remember if that was my mistake, lol.
Delete"pour the color and the hydrogen, and mix them thoroughly with the brush." Aside from that, your paragraph looks nice! :)
Thanks Nelly, you told me that use a comma there.. but thanks for your coment :3 <3
DeleteMaking delicious spaghetti is easy if you follow the next steps. First, choose any kind of pasta, tomatoes (2 pieces), a seasoning cube, garlic, butter, ½ Kg. of ground beef, salt and pepper, and a tomato puree. Then, put the pasta into a recipient with boiled water and wait for 14 minutes. Meanwhile, you can start making the meat balls (any size you want), and spice them with salt and pepper. Once the pasta is ready, take out the water and put the pasta aside for a moment. Slice the two pieces of tomato and the garlic, and put them in a deep prying pan along with the tomato puree and the seasoning cube, then add some butter. When the mixture starts boiling, add the meat balls you made before and wait until they are completely cooked. Lastly, just add the pasta and mix a little until it boils. Now turn the stove off, spread some cheese in the pasta, and serve.
ReplyDeleteNelly Madelein Montes Mata
Hello Nelly, I like your paragraph, and I see you correct the "Frist", okay Nelly you are perfect and did not make more mistakes. And I am hungry because of your paragraph.
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ReplyDeleteCooking a cake is a piece of cake, literally. You will be using the next ingredients: 3 eggs, 1 cup of water, 1/3 cup of vegetable oil, and flour. You can choose one of those cake mix that they sell at any store, it can be the flavor you prefer. First, you need to preheat the oven for 15 minutes, then you blend the cake mix, oil, water, and eggs in a large bowl at low speed until moistened. After that, pour the mix in a pan and bake immediately. The baking depends on the size of the pan but regularly you need to bake it for about 24-29 minutes. The cake needs to cool in pan for about 15 minutes before frosting. And that is it; you can now enjoy your master piece.
ReplyDeleteEsther Lourdes Castillo Gonzalez
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ReplyDeleteHow to rent your first apartment
ReplyDeleteIf you are student and you don't want any problems when you rent your first apartment, you should check the next recomendations. First, you have to see if the apartment is close to your college, in that way, you don't have to walk along distance. Later, you should check the prices of all of them and choose the cheapest one. After that, you have to decide if the neighborhood is a safe place to live. Finally, you must choose the most comfortable one, checking if it has green areas and furniture where you can do what you want like sleeeping , studying and eating. If you follow these steps, you'll enjoy your first apartment.
Hi Enrique!
DeleteI am glad you checked the vocabulary; Now I can see you changed the words for better ones that really express all your ideas making finally a great process paragraph!
Do not give up!
Thanks, your comment will help me to order and express better my ideas.
DeleteCooking is very easy but is more delicious to eat something sweet for breakfast or afternoon snack, so, in this paragraph, I will explain how prepare a delicious hot cakes for youself or share with your family. First, you should put in a container the flour, the eggs and milk and you begin to beat the mix, after you add the sugar, the butter, and the vanilla, again, you beat the ingredients again and it is all mixed well, after that, you can start to prepare your hot cakes. You put a skillet in a fire; you let heat for 5 minutes and after this time pour the mixture in the skillet so that they are in a circle, or if you prefer you can make different shapes of what you want, then you should be very careful that they do not burn, you have to let that they heat by less than 2 minutes and turn it around, also, you leave it less than 2 minutes until well cooked and ready! You can start eating and enjoy your hot cakes.
ReplyDeleteHow to prepare a lemon pie.
ReplyDeleteLemon pie is a delicious dessert, and the most important, is that is easy to make. First, put cookies into the base of the containes, then blen lemons, evaporated milk, and condensed milk; when you have all the ingredients mixed, put some of the mixture in the container with cookies, then put a base of cookies and add more mixture. Finally, put into the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes and then you can eat it.
Hi Cesy!
DeleteExcellent your paragraph. Good thing you´ve added what was missinh you.
Thanks Nati :)
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ReplyDeleteHow to use Twitter
ReplyDeleteIf you do not want to be old fashioned, here are some steps for you to learn how to use Twitter. First, you need to create an account; it will be easier if you already have an e-mail account. Then, you have to fill all the basic information, and after that, you will be able to customize your account, starting with a name and a picture that represents you. Later, you will have to follow people who also have an account, like your family, friends, and people of your interest and even people you do not know from all around the world. With Twitter you will be able to express to the world everything you think and feel. Finally, some general recommendations are: you should write correctly, do not insult anybody, and of course do not forget that Twitter is a universal platform and everybody can see what you post on it.
By: Melina Garza Meléndez
Melina, I think your topic sentence is very good because it introduces to your paragraph.
DeleteThen, I think you should use "would" instead of "will" because it is not sure if it will be easy. Also I see you added the comma that your forgot between "information" and "after that", very good! That shows you take in care my recommendations.
I also see you changed the word "twitter" to "Twitter", that is also good because I told you to change it because in the rest of the paragraph you mentioned it with capital letter.
And also, I see you added the colon that I suggested to use at the end of the paragraph.
Good Job :D
Thank you so much Gerardo for all your recommendations they really helped me with my process paragraph especially in those little details I forgot at the beginning!
DeleteThanks for your comment!
How to choose College Majors
ReplyDeleteMany students follow careers that are not related to their college majors, this means that you'll spend a lot of time studying whatever subject you choose, and there are a lot of factors to consider before you commit. Ask yourself the question: What factors should I consider when choosing College Majors?
First, make sure that you can and will do the coursework required for the career of your dreams; second, as a student you should select a major because you love the subject or you are really interested on it, this will help you a lot once you are in the field, this means getting good grades and also have a good relationships with peers; finally, if you have no idea about what you want to study, it is fine, you can search for an academy off campus and that will help you find your best fit major.
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DeleteIt is a good paragraph because you express your ideas correctly, but you just have to check something; you should take out "and" and put a coma after "finally" because "and" is needless and you introduce material in your paragraph after the adverb. Also, you should add information in the next sentence, you can write, "if you have no idea about what you want to study..."
DeleteThat's all, well done!
Thank you Enrique, I checked all the corrections!
DeleteYou don't need to go to a salon to have great looking nails. To give yourself a manicure at home, begin by removing any remaining nail polish with a cotton ball and some acetone; then, wash your hands with regular soap and warm water. After, dry your hands with a towel and use a cuticle remover to push back the cuticle so you have a smooth canvas. Next, give your nails the shape you want using a nail filer that is not too hard. Finally, clean them with a cotton ball soaked in alcohol and paint them with base coat and the nail polish you choose. Remember not to apply more than two coats to avoid chipping.
ReplyDeleteHow to stay sober on a saturday night.
ReplyDelete- There are some useful ways to stay sober on a saturday night, one of these ways is not hanging out with your friends and avoiding them the whole day, despite they get angry with you they will understand that you do not want to get drunk. To complent this you can stay at home watching movies or playing videogames all night long if you want.
Another way could be asking someone to keep your money and do not let him o her give it back until some days after, it does not matter how many times you ask for it. If someone keeps your money until monday you will not get drunk on saturday night.
How to choose a college Major.
ReplyDeleteWe know that choosing a college career is an important decision that can be difficult in your life. There are some steps to follow that will help you to choose the best option and do not change your mind. So, first you have to ask yourself what you like doing and what kind of work you want, these are some important that wil help you to if you are confused. Then, if you have an idea of what kind of career are you interested you have to check some schools, the programs, the labor camp and, investigate all about these career. Other thing that helps you is take some tests of vocational guidnce in your high school or internet. And after these steps, you will feel more secure about your college major.
Hi, Laura
DeleteYour ideas are organized.The fist time that I saw you paragraph you had some mistakes, but now I can see that you fixed it. In general your topic sentence and paragraph are good.
Good Job Laura :)
Hi Ale!
DeleteYes, I fixed these mistakes, Thanks for your comment.
How to make pancakes.
ReplyDeleteYou will cook delicious pancakes, if you follow these steps. First you have to mix 2 cups of flour, and whisk one egg. After whisking, add a cup of milk with 2 spoons of melted butter into the bowl. Then, use a ladle to put the same amount of batter to the skillet for each pancake. Later, let the pancakes cook for about three minutes or until the bubbles disappear of the batter. Finally, flip the pancake and cook the second side for about two minutes. Now you can prepare the most delicious homemade pancakes.
Hi, Ale. Your paragraph has the necessary information about the topic, so that is awesome. I think you should check some commas but in general your paragraph is good. You made me feel hungry! Congrats.
DeleteHi, Tania.
DeleteI always have trouble with the puntuaction for me is very difficult use them. Thanks for you advices and comments :)
Rice pudding
ReplyDeleteThe first thing we will do is in hot water put the rice and leave it for 10- 15 minutes.
The second step is throw the watter add milk, butter, vainilla and sugar to warm up.
Step number three is, to remove everything you add then, and the rice.
Step number four is to let the rice absorb the milk and leave it to heat slowly for 20 minutes, then stir it so it doesn't strick.
And finally, remove it from the fire. Ready to eat the rice puddinng.
Hello Nati, I realized you've already corrected the mistakes I told you the last class, I think you should take out "and" before finally,and you should write a topic sentence, but your paragraph is perfect it is clear, the ideas are organized and I understand it.
DeleteThere are some small and easy things you can do to take care of the environment and save money. First it is convenient that you turn off the lights when you leave a room, and also unplug the appliances when they are not in use or when you are not at home, those are examples of easy things you can change at home and help the environment. When you go to buy the groceries take your own bags, with that you will reduce the use of plastic bags; therefore there will be less waste.
ReplyDeleteAnother way to reduce waste is by taking with you your own bottle of water and also you can save money at the same time. And finally the most creative and funny ideas to take care of the environment is by recycling and reusing; you can find many ideas on internet to reuse things that you think did not work anymore but you can give them another use. Taking care of the environment also can help you to save money.
Hello daisy,
DeleteYour ideas are organized,you have an excellent structure,and your spelling is good.
in general,It is a good and interesting paragraph.
hi vivi
Deletethank you for your coment. i will keep improving my writing skills.
How good health.
ReplyDeleteHave a good health, we should follow a balance diet if you maintain a healthy weight and reduce the risk of diseases such as diabetes, heart disease and stroke you should not or with moderation, because if you do not have the risk of developing mental problems such as anxiety or depression. You have to make a lot sport, as this helps you brain to release hormones of happiness and helps improve the sense of wellbeing. One of the most important things is to rest and sleep well, because if you do not sleep well may feel tired and unmotivated and leaves you without power. And another thing must always be smiling and laughing.
Hi, Viv :)
DeleteI remembered that I wrote some suggestions about your paragraph, even you corrected some of these. Your ideas are disorganized and you have some spelling mistakes but I think that your knowledge about the topic is very good and interesting. I just want to suggest that to have a better order before writing; you make a list and follow it.
Good job, Viviana!
thank you every much Lea. for your comment, I will try ti improve.
DeleteHow To Stay Sober On A Saturday Night
ReplyDeleteStaying sober on a Saturday night might seem difficult, but is not that hard to accomplish. The easiest way to stay sober is staying at home without alcohol, so you are not tempted to drink; another way is going out to some place where they do not serve alcohol; like Ihop, Waffle House, McDonalds, Burger King or something like that. If you decide to go to a party and drink, you should drink one cup of water for every alcoholic drink you have so, like that, the alcohol level on your blood does not go up; or you could also eat bread to stay sober because the bread absorbs the alcohol and you will not get drunk. After all, if you drink and did not take these tips into consideration, at least you should not drink and drive, and like that, you will not put your life in danger.
I see you changed the few words I told you about and that you've already checked the coherence in your ideas. The paragraph sounds better now with the punctuation marks corrected. Well done Andres, keep it up! :)
DeleteI usually fail to use the correct punctuation marks and I should definitely pay more attention in that, thanks for your comments they help me a lot. :)
DeleteHi Vanessa, Your paragraph is really good, I like that you changed the few words I told you about, Thanks for thanking my comments into consideration, keep up the good work. :)
ReplyDelete-Cooking a Cheesecake has never been easier.
ReplyDeleteWithout frustration, without tears and without expend a lot of hours in the kitchen. Just relishing it.
So let is start to make it. To make cheesecake, you will need: 1 biscuit base, 2 bars cream cheese(226g each), 1 can of la lechera sweetened condensed milk, 2 teaspoons lemon juice, and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract.
Then, you start taking your beater and in it you will add the 2 bars cream cheese and 1 can of la lechera sweetened condensed milk, and you mix them completely. When they are mixed, you will add 2 teaspoons lemon juice and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract, and you will continue mixing it until a homogeneous mixture. After, you are going to pour the mix into your biscuit base with the help of a spoonbill to spread well the mixture, and finally you are going to put the cheesecake in the refrigerator for two hours and when the time pass, you can put it off, and it is the time to enjoy it.
hi lea
DeleteI think your paragraph is great , I could not find errors.The topic sentence fits really well with the content in your paragraph, and the way you explain the process is really clear.
Hi, Deisy :)
DeleteThanks for your comment! I had some problems for choose the topic but I think that I chose well.
How to avoid a nervous breakdown during exams
ReplyDeleteDon´t breakdown during exams week! If you feel nervous after an exam,there are some tips to follow to avoid nervous breakdown during exams:
First,try to study at least 2 days before the exam, that will help you to memorize information. Next, sleep at least 8 hours the night before the exam, and do not study all night long because this will increase the pressure and nervousness.
The day of the exam, wear comfortable clothes and sit in a chair in front of the blackboard, and try to feel confident about yourself. Also,first of all, begin with the answers you know, and in the end,the difficult ones.
Finally,after the exam, relax and eat something sweet.
Gerardo, you wrote a really nice paragraph! The grammar is correctly and also the punctuation marks. You wrote all the necessary information about the topic.
DeleteYou did a good job! :)
Thank you very much for your comment Dulce :D I hope i continue writing like this
DeleteI've noticed that now sounds better than the last one, thank you for your advices :)
ReplyDeleteHow to be happy
ReplyDeleteThere are some aspects that could make our life better and happy. First, we have to be conscious that money does not buy happiness; maybe you are a rich person who has everything you want in life, buy it does not mean that you are happy. Then, do what makes you feel better, free, passionate or excited; no matter what the other people say, but it does not have to affect them too. Life comes with no second chances, no guarantees; so we have to live to the fullest. Taking time to reflect, and making conscious steps to make our life happier, really does work. To be happy we have to love ourselves: accept who or how we are, love our defects, never compare ourselves to others, everyone is unique on his way. We have to love ourselves to love everyone else. And finally, be happy because we are alive! We are a miracle of life.
Hi Tania!
DeleteWhen I checked your paragraph I did not found any mistakes, your ideas are organized and your puntuaction is good.
Good Job!
Thanks, Laura... I only had some troubles when I was selecting my topic sentence, but I think I did a good job. :)
DeleteMaking ice cream has never been as easier as today. First of all, you will need these ingredients: 2 cups of heavy cream, 1 cup of milk, 2/3 cup of sugar, and 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract. You have to mix all the ingredients, it will be the base. Then, you must heat it until the sugar disolves (it takes about 10 minutes), place it over medium high heat. After that, you are going to put the cream base into a bowl for 1 or 2 hours. Next, you are going to pour the mix chilled into the ice cream maker and freeze it according the instructions of your ice maker. When it is almost frozen you can add some fruit to your ice cream. Then, you put it back into the refrigerator for about three hours. Finally, once it is frozen, you can enjoy your ice cream.
ReplyDeleteIf you make ice cream, give me some :p
DeleteYou did it great, just write "chilled mix" not 'mix chilled', CHILLED is an adjective and add "how to make..." :)
Good job, Salma. :D
Taking care of your baby sister is not a hard work; you must pay attention on the following pieces of advice or recommendations. First of all, you must be patient, and if you consider yourself an impatientient person, you will have to learn to be patient. Patience is required because sometimes your baby sister will cry for obvious reasons (she wants to eat, she wants her diaper to be changed, etc.) but sometimes she will be crying for no reason. Another reason of needing patience is because she will want to be playing on the floor and taking everything she sees to her mouth. You will need to take a lot of care about this and be looking over her. Next, you have to be aware of her needs like changing her diaper minutes after she has eaten or drunk something and also after a nap; also, you have to be aware of giving her food. When she is from 0 to 6 months, she needs to drink milk every 2 hours. From 6 to 8 months she will be capable to eat fruit (banana, apple, peach), vegetables (broccoli, sweet potato), Gerber, and milk (at morning, at afternoon and at night). When you give her fruit and vegetables, you have to cut each fruit/vegetable in very tiny pieces so that the baby can eat it.
ReplyDeleteWhen a baby has already eaten and her diaper is clean, she cries because she wants to sleep. I used to sing lullaby's to my sister or even when she was sleeping, I played on YouTube some classical music. Otherwise, when she is playing I play "Patch the Pirate" songs.
For last, if you have enough time, you can take her to a ride at the park on her stroller or let her crawl on the floor and play with her toys.
Hi Brenda!
DeleteYou're paragraph is well done, but you should try to make shoter the idea about being patinet and give another concluding sentence, nevertheless the paragraph has good structure and good use of connectors as first of all, next, for last etc..
WELL DONE!
How to make lemonade.
ReplyDeleteMaking lemonade is very easy; There are just a few steps we have to do in order to prepare it.
First of all we have to fill a jar of water (cold water), you decide how many liters you will make.
Then, add four full spoons of sugar (approximately) and five lemons, all of this depends on how many liters of lemonade you will make...
Finally, we mix all of the ingredients and we add some ice (because it is better cold).
Now, you can enjoy it with a meal with your family,
Hi Lídice!
DeleteI already read your process paragraph and it's okay, your ideas and the process are clear. You used the connectors well, and I saw that you changed your only mistake.
Hey Jenny!
DeleteThank you for correcting and letting me know about my mistake. It was nice working with you ;)
How to be perfect for a XV's party step by step.
ReplyDeleteBe ready for a XV's party would take some steps. First you need to eat early for not being worried about eating when you are preparing for the party. Then you need to take a shower early if you want to use a hair iron or something like that, it need to be dry. If you want play some music to relax you and do everything happily. The next step is the makeup, it will take you 15 minutes or more, it depends if you want a professional or an easier makeup. If you want you can paint your nails the same color of your dress, you need to wait some time until your nails get dry. After that in order to have a nice makeup (when you were waiting for your nailsto dry) you can put lashes. Then, after you do all of that your hair will be dry and you will be ready to do your hair a nice hair style. Finally, you put your dress and shoes. and before you get out of your room you put a necklace to be ready for the party.
Hi Jenny!
DeleteI see you corrected the mistakes you had on your paragraph. Now the ideas are clear and understandable ;) Just a little observation, in the penultimate sentence there is a few mistake where you put a point instead of a comma.
Great Job :):)
HOW TO RENT YOUR FIRST APARTMENT
ReplyDeleteThe first thing to consider when you are about to rent your first apartment is the money, you cannot buy one with 10,000$ they are more expensive. After that you to choose very well the location of the apartment, if you are a student, obviously you have to buy one near your school and maybe for safety choose a secure area; then if you have enough budget you can buy furniture for you apartment; try to buy just the necessary things for you, sofa, chairs, stove, refrigerator etc… buying an apartment is not as easy as we use to think, you have to plan everything carefully maybe you will need some help, so try to find someone who can help you to choose the perfect apartment for you.
Hi,Julio!
DeleteThe first time I checked your paragraph you had only a few mistakes:
1.A few punctuation signs were missed.
2. In a conditional sentence you forgot to write will/can (in the sentence that says: "if you have enought budget you CAN/will buy furniture...").
3. Some missing words.
Julio, your paragraph is really good. You just have a few mistakes on the last paragraph. In this final paragraph I noticed that you corrected them.
Good job :)
How to order pizza by phone
ReplyDeleteSometimes there is not food in the fridge and you are starving; the solution is pizza.
Ordering pizza by phone es very easy to do and it does not take you a long time.
First, you have to think about your pizza: the ingredients you want, size, the cost, etc. Once you know what kind of pizza you want, you have to look for your favorite Pizza restaurant's number. Now, get your phone and call to order your pizza. They will ask you the size you want, ingredients, etc.
The pizza delivery man will arrive to your house and you will have to pay the pizza. Finally, you will have fun eating your pizza.